I never realized how much the old saying "don't judge a book by its cover" was true for cancer as well. You don't have to "look sick" to be sick.
A few weeks ago I was in the hospital for a few days. I was there due to pain I wasn't able to get under control. The pain was, and continues to be, in my right upper leg on the outside of it. I have this pain daily, the management I am still working on though. I was released from the hospital on Friday night so I could make it to a wedding I was going to be in on that Saturday. I was released without a real reason for the pain and given options for pain management.
On the next morning I headed out for a day full of wedding activities and I remember saying to myself and aloud to others when they would talk about it that today wasn't about me or cancer, today there was no cancer. Today was a wedding day for my friends. It was a non-cancer day. However, just wishing away cancer doesn't make it so.
While I was refusing to let it be a "cancer day" I was also not managing my pain the way I should of. I knew we would be having drinks throughout the day. I didn't want my pain management medications to interact with the mimosa or two so I wasn't taking them the way I should have. That resulted in, what I knew would happen, me being in extreme pain when the evening rolled around. Try as I may my friend's amazing wedding day was still a "cancer day" for me. It was a pretty enjoyable one though!
This brings me back to the fact that you don't have to look sick to be sick. The wedding pictures were great. I loved seeing all the pictures taken throughout the day and evening. Then I found a picture of JR and myself. Honestly, it is a great picture. We accidentally had matched (Jackie made this amazing necklace for me which happened to match JR's tie for the event) and I feel like we look pretty badass. When I saw the picture I had two thoughts - 1. We look badass; 2. Wow, I honestly wanted to cut my own leg off if it would remove the pain I was having at that moment.
I sent this picture to friends and just said "this is the epitome of the idea that you don't have to look sick to be sick."
Next time you are wondering why someone is boarding a plane with the disabled group, parking in a handicap spot, or just struggling to keep up I hope that you remember. Think of this post, this picture and know you don't have to look sick to be sick.
A few weeks ago I was in the hospital for a few days. I was there due to pain I wasn't able to get under control. The pain was, and continues to be, in my right upper leg on the outside of it. I have this pain daily, the management I am still working on though. I was released from the hospital on Friday night so I could make it to a wedding I was going to be in on that Saturday. I was released without a real reason for the pain and given options for pain management.
On the next morning I headed out for a day full of wedding activities and I remember saying to myself and aloud to others when they would talk about it that today wasn't about me or cancer, today there was no cancer. Today was a wedding day for my friends. It was a non-cancer day. However, just wishing away cancer doesn't make it so.
While I was refusing to let it be a "cancer day" I was also not managing my pain the way I should of. I knew we would be having drinks throughout the day. I didn't want my pain management medications to interact with the mimosa or two so I wasn't taking them the way I should have. That resulted in, what I knew would happen, me being in extreme pain when the evening rolled around. Try as I may my friend's amazing wedding day was still a "cancer day" for me. It was a pretty enjoyable one though!
This brings me back to the fact that you don't have to look sick to be sick. The wedding pictures were great. I loved seeing all the pictures taken throughout the day and evening. Then I found a picture of JR and myself. Honestly, it is a great picture. We accidentally had matched (Jackie made this amazing necklace for me which happened to match JR's tie for the event) and I feel like we look pretty badass. When I saw the picture I had two thoughts - 1. We look badass; 2. Wow, I honestly wanted to cut my own leg off if it would remove the pain I was having at that moment.
I sent this picture to friends and just said "this is the epitome of the idea that you don't have to look sick to be sick."
Next time you are wondering why someone is boarding a plane with the disabled group, parking in a handicap spot, or just struggling to keep up I hope that you remember. Think of this post, this picture and know you don't have to look sick to be sick.
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