Living Life with Cervical Cancer

Happy & Sad Tears

1/14/2018

This week I was able to take Wylee to his first big concert. He had asked Santa for tickets to take Mommy to a country music concert. I was so proud of him asking for an experience vs an item. Well, Santa pulled through with some pretty good tickets for Chris Young. I might not have known the songs by the three bands that played that night, but you know what, none of that mattered. I was there with Wylee and we had the time of our lives. He made it strong through the first two bands, ate all the cheesy Bankers Life Fieldhouse food, and danced together to the songs. We were able to Facetime people and show them where we were at and how awesome it all was. I think between the two of us there is plenty of video and pictures to last a lifetime, shaky as they may be.

As we got into the Chris Young section of the concert it was pretty late and Wylee was super tired. He started out strong standing on the chair as I sat in front of him so his chair didn't flip, as the songs went on he kneeled behind me, then eventually he sat down, then I felt him leaning his head on me and snapped a picture. He had fallen asleep in the concert! It was equally adorable and confusing. I don't think I could sleep in that setting!

On the way home from the concert Wylee fell asleep. I kept it on our country music Pandora station and a song came on that I used to sing as a kid: Holes in the Floor of Heaven by Steve Wariner. I know some of you will think it is odd that I was singing along and listening to this song since I am not religious but a lot of the songs I have always listened to have things related to religion; many many songs do. So, as I am listening to this song I am thinking how I just had this epic experience of taking my son to his first concert and I'm singing along and really trying to take in the words to the song. I am going to include the lyrics below, but, the part that really hit me is when the kid is getting married at 23 and it starts raining; when it starts to rain they explain it is okay to not be sad because the parent is watching over the wedding from heaven and the dears are coming down in the form of rain.

It just hit me as I was driving and I started to cry. You never know when the emotion is going to hit you, the reminder that I won't be here forever and I won't be able to see all of the special moments in my son's life. I hope he remembers that everything will be okay in the end. Now, I think it is time to get started on more letters for Wylee's special times in his life. I want him to have letters written by me that he can open up as special events happen; if I am here still we can open them together, if I'm not then he will have them.

One day shy of eight years old,
When grandma passed away.
I was a broken hearted little boy,
Blowing out that birthday cake.
How I cried when the sky let go,
With a cold lonesome rain.
My mom smiled, said: "Don't be sad child.
"Grandma's watching you today."
"'cause there's holes in the floor of Heaven,
"And her tears are pouring down.
"That's how you know she's watching,
"Wishing she could be here now.
"An' sometimes if you're lonely,
"Just remember she can see.
"There's holes in the floor of Heaven
"And she's watching over you and me."
Seasons come and seasons go,
Nothing stays the same.
I grew up, fell in love,
Met a girl who took my name.
Year by year, we made a life,
In this sleepy little town.
I thought we'd grow old together,
Lord, I sure do miss her now.
"'cause there's holes in the floor of Heaven,
"And her tears are pouring down.
"That's how you know she's watching,
"Wishing she could be here now.
"An' sometimes if you're lonely,
"Just remember she can see.
"There's holes in the floor of Heaven
"And she's watching over you and me."
Well my little girl is 23,
I walk her down the aisle.
It's a shame her Mom can't be here now,
To see her lovely smile.
They throw the rice, I catch her eye,
As the rain starts coming down.
She takes my hand; says: "Daddy don't be sad,
'cause I know Mama's watching now."
"'cause there's holes in the floor of Heaven,
"And her tears are pouring down.
"That's how you know she's watching,
"Wishing she could be here now.
"An' sometimes if you're lonely,
"Just remember she can see.
"There's holes in the floor of Heaven
"And she's watching over you and me."
Watching over you and me.
Watching over you and me.
Watching over you and me.

30 Comments

Author

Erica is a 32 year old cervical cancer advocate who is out living cancer for the third time. When she isn’t advocating for cervical cancer and HPV awareness as a Cervivor Ambassador, she previously oversaw the STEM program at the school where she was an educator; she now helps coordinate the robotics program. Erica enjoys spending time with her husband and son in their Indianapolis neighborhood, as well as pursuing new and adventurous hobbies. She can most recently be found fawning over kayaks and daydreaming of returning to whitewater kayaking with First Descents, an organization for young adults impacted by cancer.

patrice cythia

9/5/2018 03:27:14 am

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Thank you so much great one.. I will continue to testify of your goodness to the universe.

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2/13/2019 10:39:41 am

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willson mary

11/22/2018 11:55:42 am

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4/10/2019 08:35:06 pm

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5/25/2019 06:19:51 am

5/25/2019 06:28:33 am

joyce benson

6/22/2019 07:17:14 am

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denail

6/25/2019 01:20:46 pm

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Ben Rita

6/29/2019 05:43:26 pm

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7/4/2019 02:20:33 am

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morgan reed

7/5/2019 01:39:23 am

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7/10/2019 06:38:45 am

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7/10/2019 08:15:19 am

7/12/2019 03:07:12 am

7/17/2019 07:36:17 am

7/17/2019 11:57:13 am

7/19/2019 06:50:08 am

jones

7/20/2019 10:00:27 am

MY APPRECIATION AND GRATITUDE TO DR PETER WHO CURE ME FROM HIV ,

I have been suffering from HIV over 3 years of my marriage and it was really difficult and heartbreaking for me because the symptom were very terrible and difficult for me, i search for cure, went to different hospital but still no hope until i saw a testimonies of someone who cure of hiv, by DR PETER, i took the chance to contact DR PETER who have the natural cure to HIV, he assure me of his herbal medication which i listen to his advice and i bought his herbal medication and i used it as instructed by the DR PETER, in a month time i went to the hospital for scan and they confirm that there is no trace or sign of HIV in me and now am happy and gladly with my family. contact DR PETER, on whats-app or call him +2349019861336... email.... drpeterwilliams768@gmail.com

HE IS ALSO SPECIALIZE IN THE TREATMENT OF OTHER DISESASES

1 HIV/AIDS.

2 BAD DREAMS

3 HEPATITIS.

4 LOW SPERM COUNT.

5 CANCER DISEASES.

6 FIBROID DISEASES.

7 GONORRHEA

8 FALLOPIAN TUBE.

9 PREGNANCY.

10 HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE

11 BRING YOUR EX LOVER BACK. ETC.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR HELP DOCTOR

7/21/2019 04:01:52 pm

MY APPRECIATION AND GRATITUDE TO DR PETER WHO CURE ME FROM HIV/AIDS,

I have been suffering from HIV over 3 years of my marriage and it was really difficult and heartbreaking for me because the symptom were very terrible and difficult for me, i search for cure, went to different hospital but still no hope until i saw a testimonies of someone who cure of hiv, by DR PETER, i took the chance to contact DR PETER who have the natural cure to HIV, he assure me of his herbal medication which i listen to his advice and i bought his herbal medication and i used it as instructed by the DR PETER, in a month time i went to the hospital for scan and they confirm that there is no trace or sign of HIV in me and now am happy and gladly with my family. contact DR PETER, on whats-app or call him +2349019861336... email.... drpeterwilliams768@gmail.com

HE IS ALSO SPECIALIZE IN THE TREATMENT OF OTHER DISESASES

1 HIV/AIDS.

2 BAD DREAMS

3 HEPATITIS.

4 LOW SPERM COUNT.

5 CANCER DISEASES.

6 FIBROID DISEASES.

7 GONORRHEA

8 FALLOPIAN TUBE.

9 PREGNANCY.

10 HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE

11 BRING YOUR EX LOVER BACK. ETC.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR HELP DOCTOR

sandra

7/22/2019 05:44:16 am

i will love to share my testimony to you all in the world. i'm form new York i got married to my husband about 2 year ago we start having problems at home like we stop sleeping on the same bed, fighting about little things he always comes home late at night, drinking too much and sleeping with other women out side i have never love any man in my life except him. he is the father of my children and i don't want to loose him because we have worked so hard together to become what we are and have today .few month ago he now decided to live me and the kid, being a single mother can be hard sometimes and so i have nobody to turn to and i was heart broken.i called my mom and explain every thing to her, my mother told me about PRIEST PETER, how he helped her solve the problem between her and my dad, i was surprise about it because they have been Seperated from each other for three and a half years and it was like a miracle how they came back to each other. i was directed to priest PETER, and i explain everything to him, so he promise me not to worry that he will cast a spell and make things come back to how It was before, we where so much in love again. and priest PETER told me that it was another female spirit that was controlling my husband, and he said my problem will be solved within 2 days if i believe i said OK So he cast a spell for me and after two days my love came back asking me to forgive him i Am so happy now.

AND HE ALSO HAVE CURE FOR THE FOLLOWING DISEASE

HIV/AIDS.

2 BAD DREAMS

3 HEPATITIS.

4 LOW SPERM COUNT.

5 CANCER DISEASES.

6 FIBROID DISEASES.

7 GONORRHEA

8 FALLOPIAN TUBE.

9 PREGNANCY.

10 HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE

so that why i decided to share my experience with every body that have such problem contact priest Peter the great spell caster on his email Id: drpeterwilliams768@gmail.com or whatsapp him +2349019861336

7/22/2019 05:46:53 am

7/24/2019 05:20:30 pm

MY APPRECIATION AND GRATITUDE TO DR PETER WHO CURE ME FROM HIV/AIDS,

I have been suffering from HIV over 3 years of my marriage and it was really difficult and heartbreaking for me because the symptom were very terrible and difficult for me, i search for cure, went to different hospital but still no hope until i saw a testimonies of someone who cure of hiv, by DR PETER, i took the chance to contact DR PETER who have the natural cure to HIV, he assure me of his herbal medication which i listen to his advice and i bought his herbal medication and i used it as instructed by the DR PETER, in a month time i went to the hospital for scan and they confirm that there is no trace or sign of HIV in me and now am happy and gladly with my family. contact DR PETER, on whats-app or call him +2349019861336... email.... drpeterwilliams768@gmail.com

HE IS ALSO SPECIALIZE IN THE TREATMENT OF OTHER DISESASES

1 HIV/AIDS.

2 BAD DREAMS

3 HEPATITIS.

4 LOW SPERM COUNT.

5 CANCER DISEASES.

6 FIBROID DISEASES.

7 GONORRHEA

8 FALLOPIAN TUBE.

9 PREGNANCY.

10 HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE
11 HERPES,

12 BRING YOUR EX LOVER BACK. ETC.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR HELP DOCTOR

emily

7/28/2019 08:13:18 am

i will love to share my testimony to you all in the world. i'm form new York i got married to my husband about 2 year ago we start having problems at home like we stop sleeping on the same bed, fighting about little things he always comes home late at night, drinking too much and sleeping with other women out side i have never love any man in my life except him. he is the father of my children and i don't want to loose him because we have worked so hard together to become what we are and have today .few month ago he now decided to live me and the kid, being a single mother can be hard sometimes and so i have nobody to turn to and i was heart broken.i called my mom and explain every thing to her, my mother told me about PRIEST PETER, how he helped her solve the problem between her and my dad, i was surprise about it because they have been Seperated from each other for three and a half years and it was like a miracle how they came back to each other. i was directed to priest PETER, and i explain everything to him, so he promise me not to worry that he will cast a spell and make things come back to how It was before, we where so much in love again. and priest PETER told me that it was another female spirit that was controlling my husband, and he said my problem will be solved within 2 days if i believe i said OK So he cast a spell for me and after two days my love came back asking me to forgive him i Am so happy now.

AND HE ALSO HAVE CURE FOR THE FOLLOWING DISEASE
HIV/AIDS.
2 BAD DREAMS
3 HEPATITIS.
4 LOW SPERM COUNT.
5 CANCER DISEASES.
6 FIBROID DISEASES.
7 GONORRHEA
8 FALLOPIAN TUBE.
9 PREGNANCY.
10 HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE
11 HERPES
so that why i decided to share my experience with every body that have such problem contact priest Peter the great spell caster on his email Id: drpeterwilliams768@gmail.com or whatsapp him +2349019861336

smith

7/30/2019 09:30:33 pm

HOW I WAS BEEN CURE FROM GENITAL SIMPLEX VIRUS
I was just 25 when I contracted Genital herpes.Other than the first two
months of being symptomatic, for the next two years, I never had any
relapses., So, it was no big deal to me.Then, when I was 27, 90\% of my
days, nights, weeks and months were spent having constant, chronic,
painful believe me, I tried everything including BHT, Lysine, acyclovir, creams, lotions, toothpaste, zorivax 5\% cream and pills too, bleach, (I would dab it on with a q-tip), ice, anything and everything.As if the sores weren't enough, there was the horrid pain of neuralgia, which I experienced on every part of my body, (you can't imagine how painful it gets when it's on your face!). . When I took a shower, even though the water temperature was normal, it would feel like hot drops of grease or cold drops of sleet.On
one faithful day i read a testimony on internet of a lady who was cure by
HERBALIST Called doctor osele herbs,so i contacted the same herbalist who send herbal cure to me through FEDEX company and i take the herbs for 1 week and i was fully cure after i got tested by my Doctor.
you can rich though EMAIL, doctorekpen222@gmail.com, OR whatsapp +2348102454875, also have cure from him and be free from all kind of diseases.

charity jacob

8/2/2019 05:18:01 pm

Am really happy that i am cured of (HERPES SIMPLEX VIRUS) with the herbal medicine of Dr LUCKY , i have been suffering from this disease for the past 3 years without solution until i came across his email of this doctor who have cure so many people with his herbal medicine, i also choose to give him a chance to help me and my husband, he told me what to do and i kindly did it, and he gave us his herbal medicine and direct me on how to use it, i also follows his instruction for use and he ask us to go for a check up after 3 weeks and which i did, to my greatest surprise our result came out as negative, we are really happy that there is someone like this DR LUCKY who is ready to help anytime any day. to all the readers and viewers that is doubting this testimony stop doubting it and contact this Dr and see if he will not actually help you. i am not a stupid woman that i will come out to the public and start saying what someone have not done for me .contact him now if you are also in need of help via email;( drluckyherbalcure@gmail.com ) call or whatsapp +2348154637647 may bless you sir for all your good works. contact Dr LUCKY today for your following diseases below HIV/AIDS DIABETES HPV PENIS ENLARGEMENT BRAIN TOMOUR

8/7/2019 11:10:22 pm

8/8/2019 08:07:42 pm

Am a living kidney testifies, i was diagnosed with chronic kidney disease
about five years ago from taking a certain medication. I have 50% loss, but
have urinary tract infections constantly, suffer from fatigue, depression,
and cramps, I thought all hope was gone, not until I come across how d.r
ekpen heal a lot of patients with (herbs medication root & herbs) you are
there suffering for same ensure, you contact on WhatsApp +2348102454875, or
Email: doctorekpen222@gmail.com, get cure from him & be free from all kind
of disease.
Website https://doctorekpenherbal.home.blog/

Giphy Olivia

8/9/2019 10:07:52 am

I was diagnose with human papilloma virus (HPV) 4 years ago and i met a doctor he told me there is no cure and i have be taking some medication the warts multiplied when trying to removed them and it got me embarrass and pains, luckily few weeks ago i was recommend to Dr Onokun for natural treatment after one week i got 100% cure and all the wart and pains got disappeared, i sheared this post because its part of my life experience, encase anyone need speedy help about this cure email Dr Onokun via, dronokunherbalcure@gmail.com

8/13/2019 07:25:30 am

Hello everyone I was heartbroken because i had very small penis, not nice to satisfy a woman, i had so many relationship called off because of my situation, i have used so many product which i found online but none could offer me the help i searched for. i saw some few comments about this specialist called Dr omohan and decided to email him on so I decided to give his herbal product a try. i emailed him and he got back to me, he gave me some comforting words with his herbal cream for Penis enlargement cream , Enlargement Within 1 week of it, i began to feel the enlargement of my penis, and now it just 1 weeks of using his products my penis is about 9inches longer and am so happy feel free to contact DR omohan on email address dromohanherbalmedicine@gmail.com or whatsapp iom him this number +2348164816038

Elizabeth Matheus

8/16/2019 03:27:38 pm

HELLO EVERYONE.. FEW MUNINETS TO REDY THIS INFOR ON HERPES CURE 2018..
2017 MY MOTHER WAS DIAGNOSED OF HERPES/ KNOWN AS GENITAL WARTS ,I SPENT A LOT OF MONEY ON HER MEDICATION TILL A POINT I EVEN LOST HOPE,BECAUSE MY MOTHER WAS GRADUALLY DYING AND LOST HER MEMORY TOO, I WAS SO DESPERATE TO GET MY MOTHER BACK TO NORMAL, ONE DAY MY UNCLE WHO LIVES IN LONDON UNITED KINGDOM TOLD ME ABOUT DR OLIHA ,WHO HELPED HIM GET RID OF HERPES /GENITAL WART WITH HERBAL MEDICINE AND HIS HERBAL SOAP ,I WAS SO SHOCKED WHEN HE TOLD ME ABOUT THIS ,ALTHOUGH I NEVER BELIEVE IN HERB BUT, I KEEP TO BELIEVE BECAUSE MY UNCLE CAN'T TELL ME LIES WHEN IT COMES TO HEALTH CONDITION I CONTACTED DR OLIHA VIA HIS EMAIL; OLIHA.MIRACLEMEDICINE@GMAIL.COM , YOU CAN TALK TO HIM VIA CALL OR WHATSAPP MESSENGER ON +2349038382931 , HE REPLIED AND ASK ME TO SEND MY HOME ADDRESS AND MY MOTHER'S DETAIL AND THEN I PURCHASED THE HERBAL MEDICINE,SENT ME THE HERBAL MEDICINE THROUGH COURIER SERVICE, WHEN I RECEIVED THIS HERBAL MEDICINE USED IT FOR 2 WEEKS, AND 4 DAYS OF USAGE THE WARTS FELL OFF, MY MOTHER I NOW TOTALLY CURED AND MY MOTHER IS LIVING FREE AND HAPPY AGAIN. YOU CAN TALK TO DR VIA HIS MOBILE NUMBER OR WHATS APP HIM ON +2349038382931.ALL THANKS TO DOCTOR DR OLIHA

Happy & Sad Tears

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