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Dear Cancer...

3/12/2016

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Dear Cancer,

Right now I am really pissed off at you.  This weekend was a special weekend.  This weekend was a weekend my family had been looking forward to.  My son had his first boy scouts event this week.  My husband and son had been working diligently to design the best pinewood derby car possible and get it ready to be entered into the competition Saturday.  Friday night I started having pain on my back/side near where my kidney is located.  Pain, I assume, is kidney pain.  Pain I don't normally have.  

Cancer, how did you know I needed to be healthy this weekend?  How do you always know when I need to have a healthy weekend?  I tried to head you off by taking medicine.  It didn't work.  I woke up in pain on Saturday.  I didn't want to go to this event on anxiety medicine and pain medicine with a possible hospital stay looming over my head.  I wanted to go and be a normal family, I wanted to be a healthy thirty year old mom.  I wanted to be okay.  

​Well cancer, the joke is on you.  I went to the pinewood derby Saturday, although I had to take time to talk to my oncologist twice I enjoyed my time and watched as my son did an amazing job.  He won second place best in show out of all the students of all ages!  He also won second place in the speed race for his division, the Tigers.  Cancer, you might have me in pain and worried about what is to come but I am winning because I didn't let you ruin my time at boy scouts today.

I am continuing to try and sort out whatever is causing the pain.  No fevers have popped up yet, however, the pain keeps coming back.  I am pushing fluids, resting, and taking medicine as needed until Sunday then deciding if I am going to head into the hospital.  My fear is that if I have to go to the hospital I will get stuck there for a week.  That is what happens when I go to the hospital.  They keep me a week.  Cancer, that is your fault.

So, I am really pissed at you cancer.  However, I am super proud of my awesome son for today and I am so glad that the time he and my husband put into preparing for the race paid off.

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    Author

    Erica is a 32 year old cervical cancer advocate who is out living cancer for the third time. When she isn’t advocating for cervical cancer and HPV awareness as a Cervivor Ambassador, she previously oversaw the STEM program at the school where she was an educator; she now helps coordinate the robotics program. Erica enjoys spending time with her husband and son in their Indianapolis neighborhood, as well as pursuing new and adventurous hobbies. She can most recently be found fawning over kayaks and daydreaming of returning to whitewater kayaking with First Descents, an organization for young adults impacted by cancer. 

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