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Giving Tuesday

11/30/2015

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Tuesday, December 1st is Giving Tuesday.  This is a day set aside in all of the holiday rush for you to support and recognize an organization of your choice.  I urge you to choose Cervivor as the organization you would like to support.

My six year old son, Wylee, has kicked off the #GivingTuesday campaign by picking to give a donation to Cervivor.  We would like to encourage you to do the same!

Did you know that cervical cancer is the 2nd most common cancer in women and is almost 100% preventable? Think about that, according to the CDC over 4,000 women will die in the United States in 2015 of a cancer which is almost 100% preventable!  Your donation to Cervivor could help ensure women have the education needed to help eradicate cervical cancer.  Over the past few years, Cervivor has made it a mission to educate women about the tools they have to prevent cervical cancer: Pap tests, HPV tests and HPV vaccines.

Join Cervivor and learn more about how Cervivor reaches out and works in the community.

Want to know what your donation will do?  Donations will go toward pamper packages for women in treatment, books of hope, scholarships to help women in need attend Cervivor School, and general financial gifts for those in need.

A few examples of how your donation can help:

  • $1,000 sends a woman to Cervivor School;
  • $100 to send a woman in treatment a pamper package;
  • $25 helps us ship out books of hope;
  • $500 for the Cervivor Gift of Giving program - our no-strings-attached financial gift. Women can use this gift for groceries, medical bills, daycare, a spa day, or whatever they want.

So, what are you waiting for?  Head on over and donate to Cervivor for Giving Tuesday!


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Through my Husband's Eyes

11/27/2015

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This week on Cervivor JR is the featured writer!  I didn't expect his words to have such an impact on me, honestly, I didn't expect words at all.  It was during a Cervivor School Hoosier planning conference call that the idea of wanting to hear from a caregiver came up, we wanted to hear what it is like to support someone with cancer.  I said "I don't think JR would write it, he doesn't really write about feelings" but I sent him the questions anyway.  It was 11:30 at night when I sent him the questions and I awoke at 6:00 in the morning to an amazing message from him.  I cannot describe how it felt to see my cancer through his eyes.  Please take the time to hop over to the Cervivor Blog and read JR's powerful message.
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Caregivers are Courageous 

11/26/2015

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I never thought as an adult I'd need a caregiver, especially before the age of thirty.  I was wrong.  November is National Caregivers Awareness Month.  I have many people who have stepped up to fill the caregiver role since my initial diagnosis.  I've had friends and family step up to attend oncology appointments and chemo treatments with me.  I've experienced amazing support which I described in detail in a previous blog post, Strength in Support.

I'd like to focus on two special people who have stepped up on a daily basis to fill the caregiver role in my life.  My husband JR and son Wylee.

This week my husband was featured on social media as Cervivor's #mcm for his support in my battle.  I cannot even begin to describe the ways he has supported and continues to support me in this cancer battle.  He was the reason we caught the initial diagnosis so early.  He was there for my second and third diagnoses.  He has spent days and nights at the hospital with me.  He has made sure our son could visit me at the hospital.  He continues to be ever supportive.

On a daily basis he continues to help support me by cleaning and cooking.  He is always there for our son, especially when I cannot be.  I couldn't ask for a better partner in life.

The second person who continues to be a daily caregiver and amazing support is my six year old son, Wylee.  It isn't fair to him that his mom has had cancer for half of his life, but he doesn't let that get him down.  He is such an amazing boy and he "helps Momma" in so many ways.  He supports me by being a fantastic boy at school and home.  He strives to get a "green or blue day" every day at school (the colors of their behavior chart that indicate a good day).  He helps around the house.  He always challenges me to be the best I can be and to do more.  He always wants to spend time with me, playing games, building Legos, or having a movie night.  At times when I can't be home because I am at the hospital he calls or brings games to play with me.  I am so happy to have such a beautiful son in my life.

Do you have a caregiver to recognize before the end of National Caregivers Awareness Month?  Are you a caregiver?  Please take the time to be grateful for any support you receive from a caregiver, not only this month but everyday.

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Cancerversary Cruelty

11/24/2015

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Today I opened up my timehop app like I do every day.  I always feel nostalgic looking back at the last several years of my life.  Sometimes what I see makes me happy and sometimes what I see makes me laugh out loud.  Rarely does what I see make me feel negatively.  Today's timehop made me feel all sorts of negative feelings.  You see, today would have been my "cancerversary."  Today would have been a day of celebration and shouting for joy.  Three years ago today my first gynecologic oncologist called to tell me I was cancer free and needed no further treatments.  He told me I would have a standard follow up schedule of every three months for a year then progressively less appointments until I was released to a regular OB-GYN.  He told me, that although it would be challenging, I could have another child.  

If you have been following my story you know, today is not the joyous event a cancerversary should be.  Today has turned into a day of reflection for me.  Just three years ago seems like a lifetime.  Since this date I have had cancer attack my body again, with not only one but two separate recurrences.  I continue to fight cancer the only way I know how, by living my life.

One thing I felt when I saw this on my timehop was cheated.  I had read up on the statistics about the trachlectomy before I opted for that to be my course of treatment.  I learned that according to the medical studies completed the five year recurrence rate for women with this treatment was 2-5%.  This treatment was suppose to be curative.  Only 2-5 women out of every 100 treated had a recurrence.  That wasn't suppose to be me.  I was suppose to be cancer free.  I was suppose to have my cancerversary!  Well, I guess someone has to be the statistic and that is me.

Another thing I felt was lied to.  Not only did the cancer return but it took my fertility with me.  No longer could I have the promise of birthing another child.  No longer would I be able to give my son that younger brother and sister he so desperately wanted.  No longer could I give my husband a biological child.  No longer could I do what I, according to the trachelectomy data, should have been statistically able to do.

Speaking of statistics, I continued my research into the statistics tonight.  As I read through the statistics I almost wished I hadn't started researching.  The prognosis for recurrent cervical cancer is not good.  The prognosis for distant cervical cancer recurrence is even worse (such as the para aortic lymph node and abdominal lymph nodes I've had to have treated).  The fact is, statistically this cancer will kill me.

Does this mean I give up?  Stay in bed all day?  Quit living my life?  No!  This means I need to find every day things to celebrate.  I might not have a cancerversary to celebrate but I have my daily life to celebrate!  I have my life to live.  I can celebrate that I was able to get up a wife and mother today.  I woke up, went to a job that I love, stayed after school to coach my robotics teams, and then went to dinner with my family and some of my best friends.  I beat the odds when I had my recurrence (considering statistically I shouldn't have even had a recurrence).  I think it is time to beat the odds on a positive note.  It is time to beat this cancer, even if the statistics aren't on my side.  

Here I am living life, join me!

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Strength in Support

11/22/2015

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As we enter Thanksgiving I wanted to share with you some things I am eternally grateful for.

My family is so grateful for the outpouring of support.  We continue to be blessed with support from family, friends, and the community.  I know that we are lucky to have this support.  I know other individuals who fought cancer and did not have a strong support system.  A strong support system can be uplifting in so many ways. In true Ball State fashion I'd like to do a count down of ways to show support to an individual with cancer. There really is strength in your support.


Top Ten Ways to Show Support

10. Reach out to community resources on behalf of the individual.  We were lucky enough to have an anonymous person reach out to the Indy Downtown Optimist Club and we received several items to stock our pantry for the upcoming holiday season.  We are so thankful for this!  I also have a fabulous friend who has supported us on several occasions by taking time to photograph myself and my family.  These photographs are priceless to us!  Please check out her business Cindy Johnson Boudoir Photography based here in Indianapolis!
9.  Help coordinate a fundraising event.  I have been lucky enough to have multiple fundraisers organized in support of my battle.  Each had a different focus and purpose.  A wonderful woman at my work organized a fundraiser which went to fun things for my family to do together.  It focused on making the most of our family time and we have definitely made the most of it!  Additional fundraisers raised funds for the ongoing medical bills.  Since my cancer continues to come back so do the medical bills.  Several friends and family members ordered special cervical cancer awareness shirts personalized with my name on them.  I also had another friend organize two separate successful painting parties to raise funds to go towards medical bills.  My sister and cousin had special magnets designed to support cervical cancer awareness and passed the proceeds on to me to help with the medical bills.  We were even selected as a family to receive Christmas presents from the oncology floor at my local hospital last year; a hospital that I continue to spend a lot of time at. My sisters church has also reached out in unbelievable ways to support not only me but my entire family.
8.  Attend a fundraising event.  I cannot begin to tell you all the individuals who have shown up and supported us through this journey.  One week I saw Facebook posts of individuals wearing my cervical cancer awareness shirts popping up almost daily.  It put a smile on my face immediately.  The live events were awesome!  I had such a fabulous time spending the evening with friends from my hometown I hadn't been able to see and spend the evening painting.  The Indianapolis event was equally amazing!  This is the third year I have lived in Indianapolis and I am so blessed to have made friends here and had friends travel from other cities to be in attendance!
7.  Read blogs and share posts.  My blog has evolved into so much more than I ever expected.  It is a platform for my advocacy initiative.  I want to make sure that all women know the signs and symptoms of cervical cancer.  I also want to make sure any woman experiencing cervical cancer knows that she is not alone!
6.  Get your well women's check.  I know what you are thinking, how does me getting my well women's check help support you in your cancer battle?  It is simple, advocacy is a part of my life.  If my story saves just one woman from going through what I have to go through I will feel accomplished.  Please take care of yourself and get your exam!  Remember to ask questions and know what is available to you.  Remember that you can request an HPV test in addition to the standard Pap you receive at your well woman's check.
5.  Offer to clean.  One of the hardest things to do during treatment is to get the strength to get up and clean the house.  I had a fabulous friend who offered to come and clean and wouldn't let me get up and do anything.  It was so great!  I cannot even describe how nice it was!
4.  Stop by for a visit.  When I was in full swing of my chemo treatments there were many times I couldn't get out of the house or would be in the hospital for an extended period of time.  I was always happy to see a friendly face!
3.  Take the caregivers and do something fun with them!  I often just want life to be normal for my family again.  I try to remember that this is our new normal but that doesn't change the fact that I sometimes wish they could just escape the reality that we live in now. 
2.  Send a card.  Here is a great source of cards I found that really touch on the impact of cancer.
...and the number one way to show your support to someone with cancer is
1. Send a text or message.  Many times someone going through treatment may not feel like talking but they will always see your text or message.  It can be as simple as "I'm thinking of you" and they will feel your support.  They will gain strength from your support.


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The Evolution of Living Life

11/18/2015

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I hear one recurring theme amongst my family, friends, online friends, and even strangers who read my blog:  “You are an inspiration.”  I always graciously say thank you to these individuals, however, you know what?  I never set out to be an inspiration.  I set out to live my life, the only way I knew how.  While living my life since my cervical cancer diagnosis in 2012 my blog was born.  I chose the name Living Life because that is honestly, all I felt I was doing.
 
This week I am happy to share with you a blog post which I wrote for the fabulous organization Cervivor.  Cervivor is a community, a learning tool, an advocacy resource, and an online retreat for healing, connecting and thriving.
Cervivor wants women who are dealing with HPV or cervical cancer to know they are not alone.  I am honored to have a blog post featured on the Cervivor website. 

My featured blog post goes into depth how Living Life has evolved as well as how it has impacted the way I live my life.  I hope it impacts you positively as well.  Please head over to Cervivor!
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Cervivor School Hoosier - Why Should I Attend?

11/14/2015

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I am so excited to announce there is going to be a Cervivor School in Indianapolis!  After attending Cervivor School in San Diego this past September we got the spark!  I, along with two fellow Hoosier's Heather and Melissa, will be hosting Cervivor School Hoosier on January 16th and I really couldn't be more excited about it!  It wouldn't have been possible without the support of Tamika and Cervivor!

Currently we have heard from cervical cancer patients and survivors from Kentucky and Ohio who will be joining us and I thought it might be important to reach out and share what our Cervivor School will be all about!  The best way I can think to do this is a little Q&A.

Q.  Why should I attend Cervivor School?

A.  Cervivor School is such an amazing experience!  It was such an impactful experience for me and I chronicled it on a previous blog post which I'd love for you to read!  Check it out here.  There is even a great recap video you can view here.

Q.  Who should attend Cervivor School?

A.  Cervical cancer patients/survivors, women with HPV, clinicians, social workers, patient navigators.

Q. I only have HPV, why should I attend?

A.  Cervivor School is full of women who have been right where you are.  HPV is scary and you should be sure to educate your self about its risks! A key element in Cervivor School is providing you with the latest news in HPV and cervical cancer prevention and treatment.

Q.  I really don't want to speak in front of people, do I have to talk?

A.  There will be a variety of events throughout the day and you will have opportunities to talk, however, no one is going to force you to talk.  Each Cervivor experiences Cervivor School in a unique, but impactful, way.

Q.  What do you expect of me after Cervivor School?

A.  This answer comes straight from the Cervivor website:  We know that everyone’s level of involvement will be different – Some of you will be advocates among your friends and family; others of you will extend out to your social networks and local communities; then there will be the handful of you, that like Tamika, will want to change the global impact of cervical cancer, thinking about women across the United States, as well as women in countries around the world.  No matter how much or to what extend you want to get involved, we believe that each of you – each woman, survivor, advocate – has value and purpose in our collective commitment to ensuring that others  do not suffer or die from cervical cancer.

Q.  Where can I sign up?

A.  Sign up here!  We would love to have you!

​Do you have any more questions about Cervivor School?  I'd love to answer them!  Please reach out to me via comment or you can email me directly at Erica.tealelfs@gmail.com.  Looking forward to hearing from you!

Have you attended Cervivor School?  Please leave a message in the comments and let me know why you would suggest someone attend Cervivor School!

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    Author

    Erica is a 32 year old cervical cancer advocate who is out living cancer for the third time. When she isn’t advocating for cervical cancer and HPV awareness as a Cervivor Ambassador, she previously oversaw the STEM program at the school where she was an educator; she now helps coordinate the robotics program. Erica enjoys spending time with her husband and son in their Indianapolis neighborhood, as well as pursuing new and adventurous hobbies. She can most recently be found fawning over kayaks and daydreaming of returning to whitewater kayaking with First Descents, an organization for young adults impacted by cancer. 

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